Advice Column - Reply

Issue regarding bullying:

Bullying, peer maltreatment, or peer mistreatment, whatever you decide to call it, the act itself will always remain wrong. Whether it is cyberbullying, physical, or verbal bullying, the intentions behind it are terrible. We have received a message from a student who has experienced a type of bullying - social bullying.

What is social bullying? Social Bullying is the act of spreading false rumors, gossip, and news with the intent to ruin someone’s reputation or social standing. This act is demeaning as it forces the person being bullied to be isolated. It's important to acknowledge that gossip and rumors can’t be avoided, especially in high school, but that does not make them any better.

We have asked our guidance counselor to give some advice regarding this matter. 

• Acknowledge and accept your feelings – It’s completely normal to feel hurt, frustrated, or exhausted in situations like this. Naming and recognizing their emotions is the first step in coping.
• Understand what’s happening – It’s important to reflect on what’s being said, when it happens, and how they usually react. This helps clarify whether it’s bullying, gossip, or conflict, and how best to respond.
• Consider their options – You can:
  • Ignore or walk away if it’s not worth addressing.
  • Set boundaries with phrases like “That’s not true, I don’t want to talk about it.”
  • Spend more time with supportive friends.
  • Report it when needed — you don’t have to handle this alone, always feel free to reach out to a trusted adult, a teacher, or the counselor for support. 
• Use coping strategies – Positive self-talk, mindfulness or breathing exercises, journaling, and reaching out for support can make a big difference.
• Focus on what’s in your control – You can’t control others’ actions, but you can control their own responses, coping strategies, and willingness to seek help. Remember that the gossip usually reflects more about the person spreading it than the person being targeted!

If you have been through this and need someone to talk to, Ms. Coco’s office is always open.

Issue regarding study methods:

Hakyoung, who scored an A on the exam, recommends doing as many past papers as possible. To the point where on the day of the exam, you shouldn’t have anything left to solve. She herself spent around 5-6 hours every day studying. She also advised reviewing your mistakes, understanding what you did wrong, rather than trying to memorize the question, as that is “the worst way to study”. As exam questions are unpredictable, you should always try to understand the problem so that you can solve it whenever, and even teach it to someone else. If you happen to struggle with speed and your nerves during the exam, she recommends practicing to finish the paper in ‘half the exam time’ as then you will have more time to go through everything once more, even if you’re panicking.